


Simple Truths

by Inevitable404



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, Other, Panic Attacks, emotional breakdown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:34:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24103717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inevitable404/pseuds/Inevitable404
Summary: Logan lives by some simple truths; what happens when some of them aren’t true?
Relationships: Loceit, Logan/Janus, Logic | Logan Sanders/Deceit Sanders
Comments: 3
Kudos: 150





	Simple Truths

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by a prompt from @/ireallydontlikepinapples on tumblr, and it was of Logan not dealing with his emotions so yeah.

There were a few simple truths that Logan Sanders lived by: Honesty is the best policy, that time is an illusion, and he was fine. Always fine. How could he not be fine? Logic was always fine, in the abstract sense. Cold-hard logic, always the rock that holds together the illusion of reality.

So why did Logan always feel so… conflicted? To put it in simple terms, or to attempt to.

Patton would say that it was sadness, Roman and Remus would say burnout, Virgil would say anxiety or stress, and Janus would say.. Logan didn't know what he would say. But he couldn't be feeling these things. He was the literal embodiment of logic, and that does not include the ability to feel.

So he found himself stuck in a loop, recognizing that he was feeling something, then immediately going into denial and burying the problem until it was once again unearthed.

“Hey kiddo! We have some toast and coffee already made for ya! The toast is nice and warm, like a blanket!” Patton said cheerfully, and Logan squinted his eyes in confusion.

“Uh, Thank you, Patton. That is appreciated.”

“Logan, looking nice today. You going to a pajama party after breakfast?” Roman asked loudly, and Logan sighed, taking a long sip of his coffee before answering him.

“No, Roman. Why would I go to a pajama party? I am-” Logan looked down in a panic and realized that he was still in his pajamas. A unicorn onesie, to be accurate. His face burned red and… tears were pricking his eyes for some reason. And he sunk out in a haste, spilling the coffee over himself and the floor.

Logan popped up in his room, breathing fast, with tears continuing to rapidly prick his eyes before slipping down his cheeks and dripping into his hands. He covered his face with those tear-stained hands, shaking.

“They are going to think I am a joke-” He muttered to himself, his words hitching and his throat was as thick as jelly. He noted that he was, in fact, able to cry. He didn't think he really could. He noted that his breaths were going faster and faster, that they were starting to make him light headed, but he couldn't focus on making himself calm down. And that only made him sob harder.

If he couldn't control whatever he was feeling, then he really was a joke. If he couldn't push things down, if he had feelings, then he wasn't Logic. And if he wasn’t Logic, then he was nothing.

“Logan- I am shocked. I thought you didn't tell lies.” A voice said, smooth as silk. Logan’s sobs broke for a moment, but he continued to cry through his hands, not having enough energy to regain his composure.

Janus’ face softened, seeing how distressed he was. He knelt down next to Logan, and thought back to something that he had learned long ago.

“Logan, name five things you can see, when you can.” He said soothingly, and waited for Logan’s heaving sobs to pause. And though it took a few minutes, Logan was able to talk again.

“I see you, I see- I see my stained onesie, my wallpaper, my books, and the floor.” Logan said, voice still hitching with every few words. Janus gave a small smile, putting one of his hands on Logans hands wet from tears.

“Very good. Name four things you can touch, or feel”

“My pajamas, your gloves, the fl-the floor under me, and my glasses.” Logan said, and took a deep breath, tears beginning to end their flow. Janus nodded in acknowledgement.

“You are doing great. Now name three things you can hear.”

“Your voice, my heartbeat, and my thoughts.”

“Externally, darling.”

“The clock ticking, then. And Thomas is typing, so I can hear the sound of that a bit.” His voice was returning to normal; less raspy and stammery.

“Two things you can smell.”

“My coffee, and… your hair conditioner. I’m assuming it to be yours, at least. I don't use raspberry shampoo.” Janus could sense the calm that Logan was starting to feel, and he shifted slightly. His work here was almost done. He squeezed Logan's hand a bit, in a comforting gesture.

“One more thing, Logan. One thing you can taste.”

“The aftertaste of fresh coffee.” Logan breathed out, a small smile coming on his face. Janus’ cue to leave.

“Well, I must get going, seeing as you are not in a state of panic anymore.” Janus started to get up, but Logan held onto his hand, fear in his eyes.

“Please don’t go- I don't want to be alone.” Logan asked- no, begged- Janus. And he nodded, and sat back down, letting Logan hug him tightly while he whispered pretty little nothings into Logan’s ear until he was ready to face reality again.

And the reality was this:

Logan had some complicated truths that he always lived by: Honesty is usually the best policy, time is an illusion, and he wasn’t always fine. And that was okay. If he was ever not fine, he would deal with it. It was okay to not be okay. Even if he did have to work on dealing with his tendency to repress, he knew he could always wake up smelling the raspberries.

Flowers, he means.

**Author's Note:**

> AAAAAAAA Hope you liked it ;]


End file.
